Friday, 20 January 2012
Nowdays, it seems to me that foreplay is something that is not often talked about. When my friends and I are discussing our sex lives, we talk about the sex, nothing before hand. (Ok, apart from the occasional nosh that was so good it needs to be mentioned!)
Obviously, there are the partners that you are with that you feel foreplay is not needed. You know, the partner you have amazing sex with so you think the before hand play is not needed. Or maybe you are not fully interested in the person so you skip the foreplay and rush for the fuck, knowing you need the thrill of the orgasm, not caring who it is with.
A short period of flirting and a slow build up on anticipation surely leads to more exciting sex? Of course it does. There is nothing like some good old fashioned seduction to get your partner really turned on.
Let's not forget, it is harder for a woman to get aroused and turned on before sex. Give a guy a wink and a flash of nip, he instantly has a boner. Do that to a woman, she will laugh and stay as dry as a nun. Female bodies need help conjuring the lust and lubrication required for intercourse.
So, I have some tips to keep the before hand play interesting, leaving you wanting more and having both you and your partner lusting after the intercourse..
1) Talk Dirty:
Dirty talk is the opportunity to really push back all the boundaries and stops. Through dirty talk you can stimulate your partner’s major senses: sound, sight and touch. Lovers use dirty talk as a way of expressing their wants and needs in the heat of the moment. If done right and at the right time, dirty talk is one of the hottest things you can do for your partner. Obviously there is the soft dirty talk where you compliment each other and what they are doing and then there is the hard-core dirty talk, where you say what you want and when you want it (and where!)
Girls, guys love it when you compliment the size of their penis so try and do this while noshing him off. Lick him like a lollipop and tell him you love it when he is hard (in a sexy tone) and he will be wanting to put it elsewhere, not just your mouth.
Guys, don't get too vulgar. Women like the dirty talk, sometimes just as much as you do but if you get too vulgar and gross, it can be a bit off putting.
Whatever you do, do not say words that make you feel uncomfortable. Try to be yourself and say the words that come out naturally. Just say what comes to mind. So, in order to sound spontaneous and really sexy, you have to wait for the right moment because if dirty talk isn’t done right and at the right time; then prepare to deal with laughter and giggles.
2) Play Rough:
There is nothing wrong with a bit of rough play. When it comes to foreplay, most women crave a slow seduction, but guys often like the more forceful approach. Men get turned on when women get a little animalistic and make maximum pleasure the goal. They take it as a sign of lust and an indication that she’s as into it as he is. To him, playing rough isn’t about bondage necessarily. Guys just want a woman who can take the reins.
Whatever you do, do not go overboard. You do not want to end up with a black eye, or in A&E! (This happened to a friend of mine!!)
3) Watch Porn If Needed:
Porn can be a great way to get you both in the mood. (Guys, do not put it on without asking your girl first, some women are not into adult entertainment!)
Put on something that both of you can enjoy (preferably other couples having sex and something tailored to women), and lie naked with each other while you watch it. Remember that a caress here and there is perfectly acceptable, even preferable. If you see something kinky that you'd like to try, make a comment about it to see your partners response, which will give you an indication of whether or not they are game. The idea here is to get your imaginations going.
4) Tantalize With Touch
When in the bedroom, any kind of touch is bound to get you both turned on. Don't go straight for the obvious. Girls, instead of heading straight to his penis, suck on his earlobes or lick his inner thigh, exciting him and making him want more. Head to sensitive parts of the body that will make him wriggle and moan. Guys, don't think we all like it when you put your head down there and stick your tongue in like a washing machine, or tweak our nipples like you are tuning a radio. We are the same as you, we want to be turned on. A girl will love it if you can make her wet without even putting your hand near her vagina. Best place to get a girl going is her neck. Soft, seductive licks and kisses are the one.
5) Use Props:
There are so many items that you can use to excite eachother. Household or bought. For example, head to your fridge and see what you find. Something like whipped cream can work wonders. Girls, spray this on your intimate parts and get your man to lick it off.
Feathers or flowers (for those of you who have seen 40 days and 40 nights you will know what I mean with the following..) A soft touch up and down her body can make a woman cum. Knowing you are watching her get excited by this will make her enjoy it even more.
Sex toys. Vibrators, bullets, anal beads, edible underwear - all can bring you dangerously close to climax.
Ice. Girls, put an ice cube on your mans chest, letting it drip everywhere. Put it in your mouth too, then give him a blow job. It feels good because his nerves and sexual pleasure can be turned on and become very sensitive to extreme cold.
And there it is. Five easy ways to drive your partner insane with foreplay. Of course, you don't have to do them all in one day. Keep things lively, fun and erotic. One last time: every partner is different and if you're attentive, you should be a success.
I would love to hear what you all like to do in foreplay, if you enjoy foreplay and any tips you can share.
Please post in the comment box below or..
Tweet me: @LittleMissVak
Little Miss V..x
Posted by Little Miss V at 18:11
Tuesday, 3 January 2012
In the past week, two guys asked me if I was a lesbian. They did not catch me oogling the breasts of another woman or going down on one, however after talking so freely and openly they wondered if I batted for the other team. By me saying 'I would become a lesbian for her' does not mean I actually would. (Apart from Sofia Vergara and Adriana Lima, I full on would!)
I can safely say that I do not bat for the other team though. Personally, I do love a good penis. But, I can understand why some women would chose to like other women. A woman knows what she wants in life, unlike most men. A woman knows the way she likes to be kissed, to be touched. A lot of the time, we meet men who do not know the 'right way to handle us.'
I personally think there is nothing wrong with admiring someone of the same sex or saying you think someone is attractive. The amount of times girls will look at another girl on TV or a film and admire their looks. How many girls have looked at lingerie shots of Kelly Brook and thought "wow she is hot!?" I know I have. Or Nicole Scherzinger dancing in one of her music videos with rain pouring onto her slim and toned body and thinking naughty things. I can guarentee more than half of the girls reading this will have thought those kind of thoughts.
In a study carried out by Boise State University, they found that out of a group of 484 heterosexual women, 60 per cent were sexually attracted to other women; 45 per cent had kissed a woman and 50 per cent had fantasies about the same sex.
Other data suggests upwards of 20 per cent of women are attracted to other women. It's claimed this could be linked to the natural affection women show towards one another when they socialise, from chatting on the phone for hours to snuggling during chick flicks.
I think that most women are naturally bi-curious when it comes to sex. I won't lie, I have had the odd snog with a female friend, or a touch here and there, reason being wanting to experience new things and explore different parts of your sexuality. So it came to a point where I wondered if it was girls instead of guys that I liked. I would watch porn to see if seeing girls naked was for me. As soon as the guy walked into the scene, I knew I was way more turned on by the hard, pulsating cock gracing my screen than the less than attractive bird fingering herself.
I do also think it is something most women will question at some point in their life.
Take Lindsay Lohan for example. Actress/ popstar/ lesbian/ Non lesbian/ Jailbird etc. She had boyfriends as shown in the media and then one day was linked to Samantha Ronson, a known lesbian. Next thing, Lindsay and Sam are dating. Then. before you know it, her and Sam break up and some guy sells a story that Linds noshed him off and she admits she likes guys. So was it just a phase? Was it an attention thing? Is it something that is always in you and you need to experience it to let it out or realise the truness of it all?
Why did Madonna and Britney feel the need to share a snog on stage for the world to see? Do they both have an inner lesbian waiting to come out or was it just to put on a good show?
Like I said, I realised it wasn't for me after a sesh with a porno, but after new pictures emerged of David Beckhams underwear line for Armani and after making a mess in my knix, it is confirmed for me, M.E.N all the way :)
For my generation it has become something of the norm and not something people need to be ashamed of like it was back in the day for example when my grandmother was a teenager. If you told your parent you were gay, you were sent to a priest to be 'un-gayed.'
Now days, there are support groups, websites, and even places like Gay Pride where you can be the real you and not need to be ashamed.
All I can say is go out, have fun, experience new things, new people and make your own mind up. Only you can do that for yourself, no one else.
I would love to hear some of your opinions/experiences.
Please comment below or tweet me @LittleMissVak or if you would rather talk in private you can email me firstname.lastname@example.org
Little Miss V..xx
Posted by Little Miss V at 20:09